
I dress them in clothes I have made for them. Bent over my sewing machine during the few hours their sleep gave me each day I had stitched maternal joy into the stripes of his shirt and the cut of his pants...
The cat plods onto my chest, all warm and steady breath, providing me with ample reason to stay in bed. Yesterday, things were reversed...
Oh hello. I have something to say. Today’s the day, I am going to make it. A motherhood statement. A broad sweeping claim, like arms wrapped around you. An encompassing statement, a forgiving, welcoming reassuring statement. A motherhood statement...
When it comes to toilet training, less is definitely more. That is, the less time and effort you have to spend on it the better. Nappies are a nuisance, but following your child around with a potty and a bottle of carpet shampoo is far more tedious...
Once again this year my son will have his uncle stand in for the ‘Fathers’ and Special Person’s Night’ at kindergarten, because his father will be overseas for the Fathers’ Day celebrations...
It feels like somebody is draining the fluid around me. I know something is wrong. I go quiet and still. Several hours later the light is blinding as I am wrenched from my comfortable cocoon...
We’re out in the backyard enjoying the weekend sun. The grass is getting long and the lawnmower is broken. I’m pulling out the chickweed to give to the old lady down the street...
She lay under the willow tree, the cool breeze blowing the leaves above her, she watched God’s fingers of light shine through the branches, the shadows dancing across the patches of green grass below...
Parents are expected to stay ‘in control’ of their lives, their children, and themselves. Some major parts of this expectation are impossible to fulfil...
“Right, I can do this.” I exhale as though blowing out candles on an enormous cake. “Nappies, plastic bags, wipes, bibs, clean outfit, wrap, nappies, keys, mobile…”
I recently returned from living in Kuala Lumpur for six months with my partner and daughter. Little did we realise we would view returning to Australia with trepidation because of the cultural anxiety surrounding children...
I tightened my arms that encircled his waist and held on. Charlie, his feet beating against my legs, stiffened and yelled, “I hate you, Jo, I hate you...
Social isolation is strongly linked to depression and other health problems. Human beings are social animals. We do better when we live with others. We are healthier and happier. Why then are so many of us ending up alone?
Mikey sat on the back step and thoughtfully pushed an exploratory finger up his nose. He was gazing with some satisfaction at the result, when his heart began to beat uncomfortably fast...
It was eerie, the looming feeling that followed her like an apparition that refused to give up on this world – the feeling, the gnawing knowing, that she had married the right man but married into the wrong family...
“Bring that sand back! It’s for making concrete, not for your sandpit!”
Raising children and renovating your home. The two just don’t go together...
We know more about nutrition than past generations. We’ve identified learning disorders and new educational techniques. We give our children every advantage we can afford, and some we cannot afford...
My sense of abandonment intensifies as I turn over the ignition and back the van out of the driveway. The car feels empty – the once endless chatter of youthful voices replaced by the silence of the vacant seats behind me. Who wants to come to the markets with me?...
Known variously as Arsenic Hour or The Witching Hour, Jungle Hour is that period of late afternoon when the day dilly dallies as to whether it will become night or not. It can never quite seem to make up its mind, and this is what babies can’t stand, because babies like routines...
“I’m going to have gas and pethidine, but nothing stronger,” my friend Jemma* told me shortly before giving birth to her first child...
Think of how the world would change for the better if all our children knew how precious they are and lived their lives in that belief? Self-love isn’t vanity or arrogance but a genuine confidence and having a healthy relationship with one’s own inner being...
A small set of feet connected to legs, torso and wildly swinging arms articulate themselves down the staircase. Banshee-like yelps filter forward in an otherwise poltergeist-free house...
Max: Not all modern dads are superheroes. Some are stuck in the transition – take my dad. He’d like to think of himself as one of those cool new-age dads, you know the ones; able to change a nappy in under a minute, cooks, cleans...
My generation breathed in the assumptions of feminism as naturally as air. Our participation as equals in the traditional male worlds of work and achievement came more easily to us than perhaps to any previous generation of young women...
At the weekly mothers’ meeting, the social worker who’s in charge of the children’s area, Agnieska, tells us how we should react when we catch our children masturbating...
Click. The front door. I turn to see him reaching out towards me, his little fists opening and closing excitedly, his legs kicking wildly...
Charlie Easeman rolled over in bed when he smelled her perfume, her everyday touch reminding him what time it was and that he was in need of a shave...
From high up in a cool, weightless place comes a distant sound; a babbling, not of water flowing but of little voices, one unintelligible and the other authoritative and rising and, alas, I am woken from bliss...
Our unplanned, multi-racial family had started off in the usual way, with the birth of our first and only biological child. The family grew, through numerous adoptions, to the unusually large number of eight children...
A mother called me today. Actually, a stepmother. She is a little worried about Megan. She isn’t sure if she should be. And she doesn’t know if she even has a right to be worried...
The shift from couple to family brings change in many areas: financial, career, lifestyle. Perhaps the largest however are in the area that started it all in the first place. From sleepless nights of passion to well, just sleepless nights, here’s your guide to sex after children...
“It’s time.” Zach stares at me and groans. Two simple words have shattered his rocking chair reverie. “Now?” “Now.” “She’s only been awake for an hour and a half...”
Mikey looked at the fishy thing on the computer. It didn’t look much like baby to him, but Daddy had said it was a baby and Daddy wouldn’t tell lies...
As life emerged on earth from the primeval slime, there was a group of cells that carried the potential to become human — to transform the jelly blob into the thinking, feeling, dreaming being we call man...
I swear my son, Levi, came out of the womb wearing a Spiderman costume – much to my dismay at the time. I was never going to be a mother who encouraged superhero play...
One day, two intrepid adventurers – one with a year’s Spanish and the other with a phrasebook – braved a trip with the local Spaniards from the immaculately clean Granada station on a big, cushy tour bus...
Jo and I met in a tutorial at uni. Back then I envied her good posture and confidence, the legacy of a private girls’ school. Once we grew up enough to marry and buy real wood furniture, I envied Jo’s renovated character home on a tree-lined street ten minutes from the city...
The situation for parents is growing more difficult in most countries of the world today, in spite of technological and material advances in the Western world. Capitalism and the ethic that supports it is encroaching on all the cultures of the world...
My mother cursed me. She pointed at me, summoned all her strength, and hurled the most heinous words she could summon straight into my little five-year-old eyes…
In the month after my son was born I was standing in the laundry, washing miniature jumpers in the cavernous steel sink. The window overlooked our overgrown courtyard and, at its centre, a multitude of white cotton nappies...
It is no surprise some friendships don’t survive the turbulent toddler years. But I didn’t know that back then. I was a first-timer...
Parents worry about many things when their child first starts school. Will she adjust to the long day? Can he remember where the toilets are? Have I given her enough to eat...
We had a ‘no more nappies’ party at our house. First, we decorated the house with balloons and hand-made posters. Then, we set theparty food out on the table – there was an array of sausage rolls, cocktail frankfurts, and chips, accompanied by iced chocolate doughnuts for dessert...
It started off with a bit of verbal jousting regarding a minor plumbing chore. “Where's that thread tape?” I asked. “Dunno . . . it was here,” said Roo. “Did you take it?”...
“Harvey, why are you so lazy and uncommunicative?” There was no answer eight-year-old Harvey could give without risking further reproof...
‘No, I do it Self!’ Annie declares defiantly as I scoop her dripping body out of the bath and bundle her in a towel. As I race towards her bedroom, large droplets plop from the tangled spaghetti of her hair...
As parents we are generally open to accepting that our toddlers provide us much opportunity to learn about ourselves. But what about when it comes to our own learning?...
The early morning sun streamed through the frosty glass of the spare room’s only window. The angle of the rays, coupled with the passage permitted by the gaping wooden slats of the attached blind, saw much of the light fall upon the computer work-station. It was radiant...
When asked what I would like to be when I grew up, I can’t say I actually aspired to being a divorcée, however glamorous it sounded, or, for that matter, a wicked stepmother...
Education or learning? ‘What are we doing to our kids? We have more benchmarks, more standardised basic skills tests, more objectives and progress checks, but many kids still don’t listen, don’t care, don’t respect authority...
Stubborn, pigheaded, defiant, oppositional, free-ranging, having a mind of their own, iron-willed, forceful, determined, hardheaded, free-spirited or just plain difficult...
The name ‘island house’ usually gives people a false impression. “Come visit us sometime at the island house,” we will say, and the image that comes to mind is that of a large house on stilts overlooking the calm bay waters...
Words have the power to destroy or heal. When words are both true and kind, they can change the world. Jack Kornfield...
The brave new world of computer-generated virtual-realities, blockbuster action films and violent video games has spawned many new industries, most reaping financial benefits many of us can only dream of...
According to my child-raising bible, a toddler’s security object is an important symbol of comfort, bridging the transition from Mummy’s arms into the big scary world...
“My patience, resolutions and beliefs are tested to the limits – sometimes daily.”*
Right at this moment one of my challenges is the constant, tuneless whistling from my elder son. When my boys were babies it was getting them to sleep or trying to figure out why they were crying. On any given day now, it might be squabbling, fighting, teasing, screaming, shouting or rudeness. Who’d be a parent? We might well question ourselves after the event, but we can’t very well put them back! Just how we find those inner resources, how we constantly demand more of ourselves, how we keep marching up that hill with a smile on our face and gladness in our heart at the sight of our ‘babies’ is one of life’s mysteries.
* © from Being Mummy by Anne‑marie Taplin published April 2007